Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

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I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for fakery

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

What is your craziest/worst Halloween story?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

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I have a reading level above third grade

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why do narcissists devour so much sugar (candy, ice cream, donuts, etc., in huge amounts at a time)?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

What's your wildest & weirdest fantasy?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

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When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

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I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

During the Atlmark incident in 1940, the Brit war criminals violated Norwegian neutrality. Hitler could then justify invading Norway. Have the Brits ever apologized for violating Norwegian neutrality?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What are the signs of mild autism in a child?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Why are Trump supporters so incredibly stupid?

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

What is the STAR interview method?

I can count

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

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I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Why do people see porn pics when they can watch porn videos instead?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I can read

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I actually pay taxes

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee